“Are you my boyfriend?” I silently question the boy passing me as I walk to lecture.
This is a game I have been playing since I discovered what dating is. For anyone who knows me, you know my type. Lanky, brunette, and preferably with an accent. Of course, there are plenty of other boys out there that I have to keep my options open. Which means pulling out the boyfriend test whenever I encounter a member of the opposite gender.
It sounds incredibly superficial, but it is a good way to pass time while walking to lecture or sitting on the bus or at a party. It’s harmless and kind of a laugh the longer you play the boyfriend test. And so, to prove it to you, I will share the boyfriend test with you so you can try it out too (works for girls too).
Are You My Boyfriend?: A Test on Finding Your Perfect Mate
When casually walking by someone
Is our height compatible? If yes, continue. If no, stop.
Do I approve of your fashion sense. If yes, continue. If no, stop.
Do you look like you are amiable? If yes, continue. If no, stop.
Are you doing anything obnoxious? If yes, stop. If no, continue.
Am I physically attracted to you? If yes, initiate contact with said person. If no, move onto your next victim.
When meeting someone for the first time
Is your voice pleasant to listen to? If yes, continue. If no, stop.
Can you keep up a conversation? If yes, continue. If no, stop.
Are you polite to everyone in the group? If yes, continue. If no, stop.
Do I want to keep on seeing you? If yes, ask for their phone number. If no, make another new friend.
When developing romantic feelings for someone
Would holding hands with you feel weird. If yes, stop. If no, continue.
Would sharing intimate moments make us uncomfortable. If yes, stop. If no, continue.
Can I see us having a future together romantically? If yes, grab him and kiss him. If no, friendzone that little sucker.
And that is the boyfriend test. If they last up to the last step then you’re golden. Otherwise it’s probably not to explore the whole “boyfriend” zone with them. I mean, random strangers don’t really appreciate you latching on their arm and calling them your “boyfriend.”
I hope you all enjoyed this post and will now become fellow users of the boyfriend test. Comment below and tell me your best experiences with the boyfriend test. Mine is when I was on the bus and saw this cute guy and started on the test and was trying to figure out his height. I hadn’t realized I was staring and he totally caught me “checking” him out. Needless to say it was very awkward every Monday at 1pm last term when we had to share the bus.
Also, if you haven’t heard, USA TODAY published one of my articles yesterday! You can read the article here. I am so blessed to have had this opportunity, it means the world!
Stay classy, Internet,
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